(Pat Blashill has refracted into several other colors in order to question the nature of existence. He'll be back in fifteen minutes. Or, if he's not, please feel free to read this irrelevant old prose haiku, from the golden years of Euro Like Me, ca. February 2005...and this one is dedicated to Keepsie..)
It seems natural that a child who came from your belly, or who looks like you physically would feel some sort of deep connection with you, and inspire deep feelings in you too. That's "just natural" and it's "God's way" and it's "instinctive." I guess that a lot of the connections between father and mother and child have a lot to do with simply living with each other and, hopefully, loving each other. But I don't know because I've never had a bio-child.
All I know is that Adinah and I have got a good thing going on, especially now that she's into the same music that I'm into. Well, she's into one song that I'm into: the classic ska tune "Monkey Man." Toots and the Maytals did the oldest version that I have, but some of my most teen-new-wave moments--and there were many--were played out to the Specials neo-ska version of "Monkey Man." Adinah seems to favor the song, and either version of it, mostly because of the chorus: "Aye-yai-yai, Aye-yai-yai (digga digga!)!" She sings along and shakes her bottom, and in doing so, shakes her entire upper half. It's such a cool dance. I certainly can't do it.
The question is, 'Why do I love the fact that she loves this song?' Because this is me reflected back from her. My passion, my history, a part of me, lighting up her eyes when she sings along and makes the gorilla noises.
Okay, one could say, 'It's a catchy song,' or, 'Jeez, you made her listen to that terrible old song,' or even, " "Monkey Man" is clearly not Toots and the Maytals' finest work,' although I might really get pissed at anyone who said this last thing. But it's also possible that she loves the song because she can see that I love it. Or that she acts like she loves the song because she knows it might help her get more cookies outta papa.
Say what you want. Fine. But whatever is going on over here at our house, I like it.
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Years after adopting 3 kids (me being one of them in 1993), a biological child was on the way for my parents. I was 21 when she was born, and I was terrified that my parents would suddenly love her more, and pretty much forget about me. It worried me to the point that I actually started erasing myself from the family, to ease the pain of this perceived abandonment.
After a long talk when my parents sensed something was wrong (I didn't return phone calls or stop by anymore) I learned that a biological child is a unique experience, but the love doesn't change. In fact, I've learned to embrace my adoption: I was chosen. It's a good thing.
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