Friday, May 25, 2007

The Vienna Summer Index 2007

Most delightful special effect:
Early evening sunlight on Early Modern architecture

Most satisfying runner-up to an Orange Dreamsicle:
Igloo Cola Ice

Least people-friendly public pool:
The Augarten kiddie pool. Mobbed, deceptively small, and home to a Dumbo-shaped fountain which dispenses quasi-lethal blasts of ice water from its trunk.

Most fantastical public pool:
The Stadion Bad. Three kids' pools, one wave pool, and two gi-normous adult lap pools straight outta Leni Riefenstahl's Olympia. Vast sun-blindness. I could live there till mid-September.

Most exciting spectator sport at the Stadion Bad:
Anette's annual fustications with the craggy (and often drunk) Serbian sun bunnies working the entrance, who resolutely stop letting anyone in thirty minutes before the pool's posted closing time. I think one year she will finally strangle that hag with the orange skin and the fried maroon hair.

Most distressing middle aged men's fashion move:
Denim short shorts, sock, and sandals.

Most (potentially) mind-blowing dish:
White asparagus (Spargel) in Hollandaise sauce

Ratio of sunny summer days to rainy summer days (estimated):
3 to 1

Most heavenly outdoor cinema experience:
Tie: Kino Unter den Sternen in the Augarten, and the Film Archiv series at the Prater. At the first, you can watch classics and cult films on a big screen beneath a crumbling and colorfully-lit WWII anti-aircraft tower. At the second, movies about carnivals or monsters, on a big screen beneath the Riesenrad, the ferris wheel that co-starred with Orson Welles and Joseph Cotten in The Third man. Cold, cold beer available at both.

Most memorable Kino Unter den Sternen moment:
Hearing loud human sex sounds emanating from somewhere behind the screen during a showing of Planet of the Apes.

No comments: